Monday, November 14, 2011

Olivia is 1!

Saturday we celebrated Olivia's first birthday.  I also celebrated that I made it through the year.  It has not been easy, but we did it.

We had 65 people at the party.  25 of them kids 14 and under.  Yes, it was a mad house. Yes, I loved every minute of it.  It was a lot to get ready for that many people.  Mom made sloppy joes. I made the famous meatballs-225 to be exact.  All were eaten...Quickly.  We had salads, snacks and everything.  Mom and I made the cake and cupcakes.  Well, mostly Martha Stewart, I mean mom did.  We had games for the kids and alcohol for the parents.  Olivia did a great job all night.  While opening presents, she patiently sat there on my lap and watched.  Then it was cake time.  She wasn't sure right away...I helped her dig in.  Then she loved it.  Red velvet cake and purple frosting.  Just for daddy.  After cake, she was swept right into the tub.  Then she got to play with all of her toys.  She had so much fun.  The rest of the weekend was a blast.  We got to hang out and play the whole time.  I was very lucky to have all of these special people surrounding me on a very tough day.  Olivia deserved to have them all there, too.  Everyone has had a part in her life.  Everyone there also was a part of Patrick's life.  I really wish he could have been there.  He would've had a blast decorating the cake and getting the balloons.  I can picture him watching Olivia eating her cake and enjoying it so much.  I thought a lot about that and him that night. 

My princess


Banner with each month

She loved the cake!

Pin the nose on Olivia

The cake

Mommy and her birthday girl

Patiently opening gifts

My big girl!

Great pictures of Olivia

Olivia and her cake

Silly Uncle Shawn!

Tomorrow, November 15th marks our wedding anniversary.  It would have been 3 years.  I have now spent more wedding anniversaries without Patrick than with him.  I miss him.

I saw this on someone's post earlier (summed up).  Don't bitch that your husband's shoes are in the middle of the living room floor.  Be happy you still have one to fill those shoes.  I would give anything to pick up his shoes or put his dishes away that were sitting next to the dishwasher.  I would be happy to have him snoring next to me and keeping me up all night.  I'd be happy to have him traveling on a business trip, because he would be coming home.  I'd be happy to have him working long hours, because he would have a job and a wife and daughter to come home to.  I'd be happy to have him be upset that he was sick with a cold or the flu, because he could talk to me.  Please from now on, don't complain to a widow about what your husband is doing or not doing.  You still have one.  I don't and neither do a lot of my new friends.  Be Thankful.  You actually have something to complain about.  I don't.  I lost the best thing that ever happened to me.  Olivia will never have her dad.  I will never be able to celebrate anything beyond our one year anniversary.  I will never be able to grow old with Patrick.  So please...keep you complaining to yourself.

My favorite picture from the whole day.  It's how he looked at me.

He made me laugh every day.  Every day.

Our first dance. Given to Fly.

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