Sunday, June 3, 2012


It's been a while since my last this may be a long one.

New Tattoo-
While I was off in between jobs, I decided on the fly to get a new tattoo.  "12763"  It's how many days Patrick was alive.

Olivia and I also got our "family" pictures taken.  Go figure, I had a coupon for a free sitting and 8x10 when I got my new lease last year.  So we went and had our pictures taken.  She was really shy at first, but then she warmed up and was the queen off the show.
Olivia after pictures.
My favorite one.

While I was off from work, I wanted to use my time to get back in to shape.  I started some of Jillian Michaels' videos.  30 day shred, Biggest Loser and kickboxing.  I was exercising 4-5 days a week.  An wouldn't you guess, I gained 5 pounds.  I think I've figured it out that it's my depo shot that I got and the hormones are screwing me up.  I took the shot to lessen my migraines.  I'd rather have a bad headache than a fat ass.

I also started my new job at Moraine Park Technical College.  I've been there around a month and a half.  I love it.  I love the people I work with.  I'm the recruitment and employment manager.  I will have much more responsibility.  I'm most excited about everything that I will be able to learn.

My new desk at work.  Melissa decorated it for me!
We also had Brea's wedding shower and bachelorette party in April.  It was a fun night out.  Cousin Payton and Uncle Shawn babysat for Olivia that night.  Shawn commented on that it was hard to take a toddler to the grocery store.  I laughed under my breath.  It's been a long time since his daughter was a toddler.  It was a great time, even though all of us moms were ready to go home at 10 because we were tired.  

Payton and Olivia on her favorite toy, iPhone.

Amy and I.  It took 10 pictures to get a decent one.             

The next day, we had Lawson's first communion.  Olivia made it through 1/2 of church.  Then I had to keep her quiet and occupied in back.  That was kind of a hard day.  It was the first time I was back in that church since Patrick's funeral.  Made it though.

The following weekend I had my Godchild, Grace's first communion. It was nice to spend some time with Tammy and her family.
Grace with her hair done so pretty!

Then Olivia's best friend and cousin, Kate, turned 2!  It was such a fun party. Rainbow themed.  We had a fun time.

Mother's day.  Olivia and I spent the day together.  We went to visit Patrick, played at the park and went to my parents for a cook out with the family.  That was also the day I ran 2 miles for the first time in my life.  I decided that day that I was going to run in the race for Walleye Weekend.  Well, I've only run twice since then. I've been sick with ear/sinus infections, fever and flu.  We'll see how things go on Saturday.

My present from Olivia from school

Dinner with all the cousins

 And now the house.  IT'S SOLD!  Finally after over a year of stress.  Let's just say it hasn't been a pleasant experience.  It started out with the house  not showing well, then no interest, then the pipes bursting because of the oil company, then new floors and ceiling, then a bunch of other stuff...and then an offer!  Well, not a good offer.  I had already dropped the price of the home 20k from what we bought it at.  Then they came in another 20k lower than that!  What?!/!  I was so upset.  I came back to a counter and they agreed. Then they asked me to pay their closing costs.  Nope. So then they countered back a measly $1500.  How stupid.  So I accepted.  Then it was time for inspection. It went well, considering it was built in 1941.  The inspector suggested they have some specialists look at it further. They had to get that done by this past Thursday. They got everything in besides the roofers.  They wanted a few estimates, as they have to replace it within 60 days, per their lender.  I let them extend it 2 days to get that done.  Then then sent another counter offer asking if I'd pay $5k towards the roof.  OMG. NO I said once again.  So Friday night I got an email late in the day with them accepting my terms and extending the closing date (because of their lender). So now I close on July 11.  I'm so happy to have the house off of my hands, but so sad.  I love that house. I'm going to miss that house.  Patrick and I bought that together.  We owned it together.  We have so many memories there in 3 years.  The last 2 years on the other hand, not good memories.  Just money out the window.  I'm not only losing out on Patrick's salary every year to help with costs, but I've lost twice his salary on this house.  Let's just say it's a lot of money gone for no reason.  It's very upsetting.  Like I said before, I'm looking forward to moving on and finding a new home for Olivia and I.  Hopefully I can make up some of the cost on our new home.

This weekend was one that I was looking forward to for a while.  Brea and Jason got married in Door County.  It was only the 2nd weekend I was away from Olivia, not involving work. Something fun for me.  I picked up Shawn on Friday afternoon and we headed up.  Met up with all of our other friends and had a great dinner and a few drinks.  Celebrating I also sold my house.  Then early in the evening, I was feeling sick and went back to my cabin.  Guess what.  I caught Olivia's flu that she had Wednesday and Thursday.  Great.  I was so sick all night.  Didn't sleep a wink.  And no Patrick there to help me.  Then all day Saturday until the ceremony, I was in bed.  I finally got ready and met up with the girls.  The ceremony was outside, it was drizzling a little bit.  It worked and it was still beautiful.  There was a chair in the front row with a black jacket hanging on it and a sign that said, "reserved for Patrick Blessing".  It then started catching up with me.  I was already sad being up there by myself, no significant other, husband, nothing.  Just me.  And I was sick.  Ceremony finished and I went back to my room until dinner.  I then came back and ate a roll and a few potatoes and water.  I was the "single" person at the table.  No Patrick.  After that, we all headed to the bar.  Water for me again.  At this point, everyone was starting to get annoying, because they had a few drinks and I had none.  Not fun I might add.  But funny. Very funny.  It was odd for me all night.  I am such good friends with all of these people and we love each other so much.  They are there for me whenever I need anything.  Anything.  But last night I felt out of place and very alone.  Everyone always had their husband to fall back on.  Getting them drinks, checking in on them, kissing them, asking them to dance, etc.  It was just me. No Patrick.  Then it got to me even more when they played "Kung Fu Fighting".  That was Patrick's signature song at EVERY wedding.  Everyone went on the dance floor and did their thing.  I sat back and watched.  I then was getting too choked up and had to leave.   Right behind me following me outside were my girls:)  They knew:)  The night ended and I walked back to my cabin by myself.  No Patrick.  I did have my friend Jen follow me and made sure I got there  and that I was ok.  We sat and talked for a bit and I finally fell asleep. I was so tired from the night before.  I then got up and was feeling ok.  Was meeting people for breakfast, which I was nervous about eating.  I then got sick again all morning.  Thank goodness I felt better later and the 2 1/ 2 hour ride home was a breeze. 
Daddy's girl

Grandma put in french braids!

I then got to pick up my baby girl!  I was so excited to see her.  She had the flu earlier this week and I was worried about her all weekend.  Thanks to my mom and dad for taking care of her all weekend.  Well, that is until she passed her sickness not only to me, but my dad, too.  :( 

We spent the day together playing blocks and with her ball.  Favorite toys.  Then it was dinner, bath and bed.  Now, I can stop feeling nauseous any time here.  I would like to feel good enough to get a good nights sleep.  I need to be good to go back to work tomorrow and take care of my girl.

This weekend I have Tammy and her family staying here for Walleye Weekend.  Olivia will be running the 1/3 mile and I will be "running" the 2 mile.  If I'm not sick.  I'm hoping to get a few runs in this week.  We will see how my inhaler and I do:)

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